Psychological experiment #2

“If you ever had twins to take care of, how would you identify them?” — Hai Wei

Some background knowledge

This is Zhi Xin, mother of, for the good of the world, hopefully no kids but all solutions. Conceptualising psychological experiments since 1999, she ensures that her experiments, if carried through, will go a long way towards proving psychoanalysis theories and helping humanity in general. She realises that these experiments, due to their radically brilliant nature, will never be approved by any conservative and un-curious ethics committee, hence she recommends that either you
a) abduct some orphans, or
b) use your own kids
to eliminate the ultimately fruitless red tape. Of course, along the course of these psychological experiments, social workers might come knocking on your door, but I assure you that as long as you carry out these experiments faithfully, nobody will be able to accuse you of anything. I’ll need to ask my more knowledgeable law friends about this though.

Experiment #2 (experiment #1 will be briefly talked about later)

You are now the mother/father of a pair of twins. What better opportunity than this to try out what happens when you treat them as a singular entity?

This is how it goes: you pretend one of them is merely an external self of the other. The corollary is, the latter is the internal self. We’ll name the twins A and B and take A as the original and B as the projected image. In actuality, A and B have the same name, the only way you can treat them as a singular entity. Give them only one of anything– one plate of food, one set of clothes, one toy. Whenever B does something good (eats his veggies, tidies up the place, doesn’t wail all night long), praise A. When B does something bad (kicks the house pet, swears, shits outside the toilet) punish A. Whatever A does, ignore. In any form of interaction between A and B, act appropriately to A– if A and B get into a fight, ask A concernedly why B (in second-person pronoun, of course) is apparently stumbling back and forth and fighting with air. If they talk, ask A who B is talking to, and wait until you get an answer from B; if A responds, pretend you never heard it. When talking to A, reply to A only when B answers.

Purpose of this experiment: What will happen if you are constantly visible, but you never suffer the consequences? Or if you are invisible, but whatever someone else does, you are responsible?

Once again, breaking new frontiers of psychology knowledge, and proving what we thought could not be proven.

FYI, psychology experiment #1 had to do with Lacan’s mirror stage– in a house full of mirrors, engineer the mirrors so that every time your kid walks in front of them, he sees a cat instead of his own reflection.



  1. Ben Leong · March 26, 2012

    I would worry if you became a mother. >_<

    • melodily · March 26, 2012

      I take it you aren’t going to conduct my experiments for the betterment of humanity Prof Ben 😦

  2. jx1992n · March 26, 2012

    “What better opportunity than this to try out what happens when you treat them as a singular entity?”

    Oh gawds I laughed so hard. Although I do fear the dark recesses of the mind from which you get these thoughts

    • melodily · March 26, 2012

      Admit it– you see the appeal of my experiments.

  3. Pingback: A wise old sage conferring wisdom I will be this semester | Melodily

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